Yesterday I somehow started a short dicussion in the comments section of another blog. It started with a comment about how the description of a class offered by the Boston Center for Adult Education made me totally sad. Ridiculous right? (Please, the class is called “Cooking for Singles” and you “learn to prepare healthy meals for one”. OMG it makes me want to die. Alone. Which I already established I will in yesterday’s entry.)
Thankfully another girl, Beth jumped in and it came out that we both have a horribly ridiculous habit: feeling bad for inanimate objects. They have no feelings! I know! They don’t get sad! They are by definition inanimate, unfeeling THINGS!
Charlie Brown Christmas trees? I always tried to convince my mother to buy them. When I was a child I would look for the lonliest, sad looking, beat up Halloween pumpkin there was in the pumpkin patch because “it was sad and needed a friend”. Even as a tiny child, I would feel bad for pencils getting sharpened in those old fashioned pencil sharpeners (the ones the you manually crank). Ridiculous. I KNOW.
What I didn’t tell Beth (or the rest of the commenters) is that I take this bad habit one step further in that I feel for people when I see them doing certain things.
For instance: when I see someone eating ice cream alone. Specifically an ice cream cone. Ridiculous! I KNOW! But to me, ice cream just seems like a social activity. Like “Hey guys, I’m feeling crazy, let’s go get us some ice cream sundaes.” and then you all have fun and eat it together!
Also, hot dogs. My sister and I share this one for NO GOOD REASON. We just can not deal with people eating hot dogs. But we only feel sad if we ourselves are not partaking of the eating of the hot dogs. I don’t even have a good explanation for this. My sister is definitely more crazy about this one than me though – she will actaully get visibly upset if you talk about eating a hot dog. My mom (who lives alone) once had some hot dogs in the refridgerator when we came to visit and I damn near thought my sister was going to have a break down.
Seriously even writing this stuff is depressing me: healthy cooking for one? Ice cream? Hot dogs? UGH.
Ok, so after Beth fessed up that I’m not the only one, please let me know that there are more weirdos out there like us. Share with me the things that make you irrationally sad. Or just make fun of me for being crazy. Either one will work.
{ 44 comments… read them below or add one }
the end of a bag of peanut M&M’s
or the end of a bag of heroin…same thing.
There’s a fantastic burger shop that opens here once the snow has melted. It’s in an old style camper trailer, the big ol’ chrome looking things. It’s called the Silver Bullet. Anyway, they make the BEST burgers I have ever had in my life.
It’s always a family thing (or maybe a buddy thing) to get together as soon as it opens and get a burger and fries. And because we eat fairly healthy, we see it as a treat from then on to go order some take-out with the kids.
Anyway, the point is, it is a very social kinda thing.
That being said, when my wife and I first moved in together, we actually lived two blocks from this place. A month into us living together, her mother got very ill. My wife flew over to go and spend some time with her (not yet knowing it would be the last time she’d see her), and I was left alone at the apartment.
Well, being a young man who wasn’t much of a cook, I ate at the Silver Bullet damn near every day. I’d walk over after work and sit by myself outside and eat and it was such a lonely experience.
Now, I simply cannot bring myself to grab a burger there if I’m alone. Just feels so pitiful.
As for your ice cream thing, I kinda agree. I feel an ice cream isn’t worth eating unless it’s with my kids. Almost feels like I’m cheating on them if I have one without them.
(Off topic, holy crap this is a long comment… I’m going to stop typing now.)
Hi Jenny! I have been reading your blog for a while now, and this is the first time I have felt obligated to comment. Why? Beause I am SO RELIEVED that I am not crazy!!!! ha! I get irrationally sad at inanimate objects, too!!
I am with you on the ice cream & singles cooking thing, girlfriend, because the thing that always gets me is people eating alone. More specifically, eating out in public alone. If the person is elderly, this earns bonus sad points. ‘Did their spouse die? They must be so lonely. How awful.’
And don’t even get me started on dilapidated christmas trees…..
It’s so weird about eating alone – I do it ALL THE TIME and never feel sad. In fact, I kind of like it. It’s not lunches or dinners alone really — it’s the little things that are SUPPOSED to be enjoyed with someone else.
Except for old people eating alone. That makes me want to cry. And sit next to them.
I had an ice cream cone from DQ yesterday. Stood out in front and ate it.
SHUT. UP. Just stop.
ok, i had to laugh at the hot dog thing. why hot dogs specifically? WHY?
i feel incredibly sorry for people who go to the movies by themselves. i am aware of the fact that you really don’t talk a lot in the movies anyway but it makes me sad to see someone sitting in a row all by him- or herself. i would NEVER do that because it’d make me feel like the loneliest looser with no friends in the whole world. also, you will NOT die alone. stop it!
The old people thing though, you never know… they may have over-medicated their spouse just to get some alone time.
the inanimate object thing isn’t weird at all.
you know how extremely against your “lone icecream eating” stance i am though.
Haha, I love that the blogging world has convinced me more than once that I am not truly insane. Either that, or we all are, sister!
Jenny, Beth, Kiley – I, too, feel inordinate sadness/pity for inanimate objects. From scrawny Christmas trees to neglected plants to garden gnomes nearly drowned when the river ran high (this happened at my parents’ house this summer). Maybe it’s not insanity. Maybe it’s a healthy (HA!) concern for nature/the world.
But it’s probably insanity. ;)
I’m so happy I am not alone in this. I’m moving and have to throw away all sorts of things and I feel so bad for “them”. As I purge I apologize to each item. “I’m sorry shoes, you were good to me” “I’m sorry lamp but you don’t work” I was so excited when I saw trash pickers coming by and giving all my things a new home. Its even worse if the object has a face.
I think it comes from a brave little toaster. That movie still chokes me all up.
old people waiting alone at bus stops = saddest thing in the world.
the phrase “would you like” makes me sad, as in “would you like a bite of this spinach croissant?” GAH!! My sister, conversely, has a thing about people eating alone. Especially men, bonus sad points if they have glasses and/or a beard. I feel that eating alone is one of life’s finest pleasures, second only to drinking alone, so I just don’t get her on that one.
This one is a little different- but fits into the “things that make me think I’m insane” category- maybe I am the only one…
I have to change the channel on the TV or radio when I know someone’s about to be embarrassed. Phone scams? Can’t listen to them. Even sitcoms…I remember once I had to turn off Full House when DJ entered junior high and the lunch monitor had the same outfit on as her…I just can’t deal with it.
I feel incredibly sorry for people who do anything by themselves… it totally doesn’t make sense as I -for example – am a person who loves to do things on my own… go for a walk… explore the city… go shopping… all these things that are great fun with friends can also be fun doing them all by yourself… so it’s totally irrational…
but hey, i am glad people hear feel the same way :)
OMG! Thank goodness there are other people with this issue. My brother says I am 1/1000th autistic since ascribing emotions to inanimate objects is one sign of autism.
Don’t even get me started on tiny scraggly plants (including Christmas trees) and poor lonely old people (I live in an area with lots of old people, so sad).
As a child, I always felt so bad for anything that had something wrong with it…I always wanted the messed-up, crooked-eyed stuffed animals. I’ve had to suppress this for years until now…now that I know it’s not just me! Yay!
I have been known to go to the movies by myself. Mostly because my wife does not share my taste in films—and the ones I like deserve to be seen on the big screen. I used to be self-conscious about it, but then I realized it was cheaper than paying for 2 tickets when she wasn’t going to enjoy herself anyway. Oh, and I wouldn’t put much faith in Beth being normal…she’s a bit off :)
I don’t really get the whole feeling bad for people eating alone thing. It’s like saying someone breathing or peeing alone is sad. It’s a function.
But I will say that I feel bad for inanimate objects like hinges, axels, I-beams… etc.
I totally feel bad for toilets.
Poop all sliding down their throats.
Poor little guys.
Cooking for singles is EXPENSIVE. Unless you want to eat the exact same thing for a week straight.
Just eat at Subway. Alone. No worries.
I’m with you on the inanimate objects. The only toilets I feel bad for are the ones in our house. Only because I see what the aftermath looks like.
I just grossed myself out.
But anyway… inanimate objects. Yes. If my lotion gets pushed too far back on my desk, so that it looks like it might fall off, I think it’s going to feel left out.
I also have this wierd thing where I have to chew evenly on both sides of my mouth.
So… don’t feel alone. haha
We are all a bunch of freaks. I love it. And somehow now feel more normal.
PS: “poop all sliding down their throats” made me both LOL and gag. Good job.
I hope you guys don’t mind if an “older” person joins in on this conversation. These comments are so funny and so real. And I needed a good laugh.
Re: eating alone – sometimes it’s really nice to go into a nice restaurant alone when you’re a “50′ish” woman-it’s kind of like saying I’m ok with myself.
Re: inanimate objects: I still have to go in to Ally’s old bedroom at our house and re-arrange the stuffed animals on her bed because I feel like their arms and legs might get tired being in the same position all the time.
hahaa whoa.
There was a man who used to eat in our cafeteria in college every Sunday afternoon. He was just the cutest little thing and I felt so bad for him. I made up this whole back story about how before his wife died they would go out to eat every Sunday and that is why he can’t bear to stay home and eat on Sunday afternoons. Everyone thought I was insane, turns out his wife was very much alive and he just wanted a break from her once in a while! haha We are all a bunch of freaks.
I am having big problems right now with being single. Wisdom, Jenny, pass it on to me! AHHH.
Girls: Being single is depressing and difficult.
Guys: I’m single. Who wants to high five?
mom, i love you!!!
i get the eating alone thing in a way. i wouldn’t want someone to feel bad for me while i’m eating alone, because i like it. but now i’m going to directly contradict myself and say that i get that someone could feel bad watching someone eat alone because i think eating really is a social thing in society blah blah blah…
i feel bad for christmas trees. They aren’t inanimate but they’re slowly dieing with no dignity.
I was super depressed when I had to sell my camera….thankfully it went to a good guy who seemed super psyched to get back into photography…sorta like I was 3 years ago :) He even posts up stuff on Flickr so I can keep an eye on an old friend
awwww Jeff THAT makes me sad. WAY sad. I just bought a new friend for my friend the D70 yesterday ;)
And ALLYSON. Can we go out before you move away from me and leave me forever and I will cry forever? (And yes, I do realize you’ll be in the same state still. I am just crazy)
You’re not weird. My sister and I have always had a soft spot in our hearts for people eating by themselves. I just feel SO bad for them. I mean, I know it’s awkward and I just feel bad that they have to feel that awkwardness! I’ve gotten better about it as I’ve gotten older and work in a big city. I see people on their lunch breaks eating alone a lot more often now, and occasionally (gasp!) I’ll even do it, even though I HATE it! I’ll usually just bring my lunch back to my office and eat alone at my desk…at least no one will see me!…and possibly feel sorry for me! :) It was worse when I was in college…I refused to eat any meal alone in the cafeteria. I would take my food back to my dorm room and eat with the company of my tv.
One time at Newcomb Farms in Quincy the old crew was hanging out and downing pots of coffee and chain smoking as usual and an old lady who was eating alone got up to gather her things before leaving. She farted loudly. It instantly killed any pity.
Remember the story you told once on tony and pals about seeing an old lady eating alone at Friendlys or somewhere like that and she said that “her eyes were bigger than her belly”.
I died a little remembering that.
oh yea. that was sad. and it was a hotdog first, then ice cream sundae next.
I’m crying right now.
Jenny, You are a natural at writing and getting the conversation going. If you started some kind of psychoanalysis blog, you’d have tons responses. People love to talk about what bothers them and connect with other people so they don’t feel so weird. You definitely have the gift.
Ally-of course, I love you too! Happy 1st Anniversary to you guys!
Hooker – I saw a pic of your new bike. Love the red. Do you have a red guitar too, or is that Andy?
I have a couple red guitars, but Andy’s is probably the one you’re thinking of. My red ones don’t leave the house.
I think I saw it in your room when we were there for Andy’s birthday.
jenny- i’m thinking we won’t have time to hang out before i move because of packing and i have to keep driving to holyoke for my new job, but i’ll be back alot. andy will be coming to boston every saturday at least and i can come with him sometimes (-:
mom, again, i love you!
hooker- i remember that old lady/friendlys story too. that one does make me sad.
Judy – I completely agree – everyone is so relieved to find out that those weird little things that we all have/do are what make us all HUMAN!
On that note, you may enjoy this website: http://www.postsecret.blogspot.com
Definitely worth checking out!
I LOVE POST SECRET. I even bought the book, read it and the shipped it to Matt in San Fran so we could share.
I am so glad I am not the only one!!!
He is my list:
1. Ice Cream trucks that come around and wait for children and no one comes. I feel bad for the truck.
2. When some one presses the button on an elevator and doesn’t get it, I feel bad for the elevator. It came and no one got in it.
3. Lights that are on, when no one is in the room. I feel bad for the lights.
4. Leaving any appliance on when not in use.
5. Having to throw away anything that another person could possibly use. (paper, old clothes, books, videos, and especially stuffed animals)
6. I feel bad for animals that are left home alone for long periods of time.
7. I hate when people leave water running when they are not using it.
…..and so many more…….